Lesson Overview

This part is designed to supplement the Focus Lesson worksheet. Materials in this part will concentrate on the concept of self-awareness – the first of the four components of emotional intelligence. 

In this lesson, you will:

  • review the four components of EQ;
  • learn about self-awareness;
  • consider a case of organizational behavior;
  • practice reading and listening.

Vocabulary: Emotional Intelligence


7 min

Here are some words that will help you better understand today’s article. Click on the card to enlarge and follow the arrows to slide through other cards. Complete the activity below if you want to practice these words.

Review: EQ Components

In the previous lesson, you learned about the concept of emotional intelligence. Read the abstract from the book Emotional Intelligence at the Workplace by Mark Craemer and complete the task.



15 min

Read the article about emotions and complete the task after. While reading, notice how the new vocabulary is used in sentences.

Emotional intelligence is a very popular theory, which claims that to succeed in a society, it is not enough to develop hard competencies and skills. It is equally important to be resilient or get along with people. Many leaders consider emotional intelligence primarily as a tool for managing relationships; however, EQ is made up of four core skills.

The first skill of EQ is called self-awareness. It means that you understand what it is you are thinking, feeling, and wanting. Dr. Tasha Eurich, the author of Insight, defines self-awareness as “the ability to see ourselves clearly—to understand who we are, how others see us, and how we fit into the world.” It is crucial to remember that self-awareness is not only the ability to see yourself but just as importantly, knowing how you are perceived by others.

Another important skill, which is closely associated with self-awareness is self-management. Knowing what you feel might not be enough, as you also need to be able to control what you feel and adapt to change. You need to be able to behave appropriately regardless of what you may be feeling. As my wife and I regularly remind our kids, “You are entitled to your feelings, and you are responsible for your behavior.” Self-management enables you to monitor and regulate your feelings, so they serve you rather than hurt you.

Similarly to self-awareness, social awareness is the ability to comprehend and respond well interpersonally. This means you can identify what others are thinking, feeling, and wanting, and then respond appropriately to this. It is about being able to see another person and identify what may be unsaid but communicated in other, more subtle ways. This requires keen insight, asking good questions, and the ability to empathize with others.

Finally, relationship management is your ability to develop, manage, and sustain relationships. Trust is absolutely vital to this as any successful relationship depends on it. This is about both the trust you have in yourself and the trust you have in the other person. Relationship management also requires clear boundary-setting and the ability to regulate conflict so you can remain in a relationship, even when things become difficult.

EQ consists of four important components that all depend on each other. When you become more self-aware, you can recognize and monitor your emotions. With this understanding, you are then prepared to learn to self-manage by expressing these emotions at the optimal time and in an appropriate manner. Learning to become socially aware requires that you can further this internal emotional insight by identifying it in others and empathizing with them. And your ability to trust yourself and others as well as to maintain appropriate boundaries enables you to effectively manage relationships.

Abstract from Emotional Intelligence at the Workplace by Mark Craemer

Abstract from Emotional Intelligence at the Workplace by Mark Craemer

Emotional Intelligence in the Workplace: How to Use EQ to Build Strong Relationships and Thrive in Your Career: Craemer, Mark: 9781647391522: Books


Emotional Intelligence in the Workplace is the guide to developing emotional intelligence, with actionable advice and exercises that help make empathetic decisions, manage stress, resolve conflict, and maintain productive working relationships. It explains why emotional intelligence is so critical for collaboration and success, along with easy ways to practice self-awareness, develop flexibility, read a room, and more.

Video: Self-awareness

Talking about EQ, we must consider all its four components in great detail. The first of them is called self-awareness, the ability to objectively conceptualize yourself, your actions, and your relationships with others. This lesson’s video will introduce self-awareness and explain how to improve it.


7 min

Watch the video below and complete the self-checking activity.

Now, after you have watched the video, answer the questions below. Click on each question to check your answers. Refer to the video if necessary by following the time code mentioned in the answer.

Back in time, survival depended on the community. Being able to evaluate the behavior and read its impact on other members helped humans fit in the tribe, where they could get food and protection.

Return to 00:45 in the video to watch the explanation again.

The “Zoom In – Zoom Out” technique is a self-awareness strategy that involves a two-level perspective to allow for a broader understanding of the situation. It requires the individual to focus on personal feelings (“zoom in”) and then take a step back to see the bigger picture or context of the problem (“zoom out”).

Return to 01:32 in the video to watch the explanation again.

Asking “why”, on the other hand, puts us in a victim mentality and prevents us from taking responsibility for our actions. Asking “what”, on the other hand, makes us more objective and helps improve our behavior.

Return to 02:00 in the video to watch the explanation again.

Feedback is an excellent way to identify areas for improvement because other people usually see us more objectively than we see ourselves. Good feedback can provide us with insight into our behavior and improve our relationships and performance.

Return to 02:37 in the video to watch the explanation again.

Case: Self-awareness

The best way to understand self-awareness is to analyze real-life situations, in which people show abundance or the lack of it. Consider the example of the company called “Good Soul Inc.” which specializes in music accessories. The company produces headphones, speakers, and other sound-related electronics. 


7 min

Below you will find the profiles of four people working for this company. Carefully look through them and consider the information presented. Click on each picture to enlarge it.

Anna is a well-liked manager of a small product design team. Kind and respectful, she knows her goals and her values. She is a problem solver; she tends to see setbacks as opportunities. She’s always engaged and tries to be helpful to her team. However, Anna struggles to give feedback because she is afraid her team won't like her. She avoids difficult decisions and doesn't always tell her employees what she really thinks.

Lesson Wrap-up

In this lesson, you have discussed the concept of self-awareness and how to develop it. The overview of the self-awareness building strategies, you will find in the Content Focus of this week. Review the vocabulary from today’s lesson:

  • hard competence

(n) a skill necessary for a profession, which is acquired within formal education (as opposed to soft skills, such as communication, teamwork, etc.)

  • resilient

(adj) able to recover fast from stress

  • to be perceived by someone

to be viewed in a certain way (=what someone thinks of you)

  • adapt to

~ change (v) get used to something

  • emphasize

(v) to give special importance to something

  • boundary

(n) limit or rule

The next part of the lesson Extend! will focus on giving feedback – a practical application of self-awareness. Visit Language Focus and review the text structure before you complete the next part.

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